#19 The Chase

At first, I don’t really remember seeing my dad that much.  Was he embarrassed?  I doubt it, he was narcissistic, he thought he was always right and nothing he did was wrong. His own form of self-preservation I suppose.  But what he did was wrong-very, very wrong.  But like I said in my post, “Dad”, he himself watched his mother get beaten and was he, himself a victim of violence.  I also believe my dad was mentally ill, something I would not realize until later in my life. 

I was still self-medicating, having learned the art of going to the convenience store and conning people to buy alcohol for underage persons.  It was a trade I learned well and mastered it!  Too bad you could not get a degree for that! Ah, manipulation-something else I learned from dear old pops.  At this time a new phenomenon started, The Chase.  There was a bar, then called Reggie’s, on the Westside of Jacksonville where we lived and my mom found out my dad was going there, so guess who else decided to become a regular?  Yep, the mom.  These were sick individuals, to say the least.  Sorry, mom and dad.  It was at this point my sister and I were left at home alone so my mom could go be seen at Reggie’s (particularly by my dad, of course).  Why?  This man almost cost you your life and certainly (along with you) almost ruined mine.  Who knows why people do what they do.

Around this time I met a really nice guy at school named Tom and he turned me on to rock music.  Up to this time I had only listened to pop or Top 40 music but he introduced me to a rock band called KISS, my second true love, right behind drugs and alcohol!  I was mesmerized by the secrecy of their makeup and I had never heard music like this before.  I started buying Kiss posters and after years, my room was filled with them, the posters covered every square inch of my room, even covering the ceiling! I also met two other girls at school, Kris and Dorene, who also loved KISS.  After that, the three of us were always together.  I liked the guitar player Ace Frehley the best!

This was still during the time I was at Jefferson Davis Junior High School.  I was smoking pot like crazy and loving every minute of it!  I would still go to the cemetery right behind the school every morning. I was starting to get so high before school it was ridiculous.  My homeroom teacher was also my social studies teacher, I think 3rd or 4th period, my lunch period.  I would be so wasted when I went to homeroom (the first place we went at JD).  I would frequently imagine the world turning at a high rate of speed, many times causing me to fall right out of my seat.  I sat next to these two black girls and they could tell I was high as a kite by my eyes and they knew I was falling out of my seat because of it.  I would explain to them this vision I had of the world turning and that was why I was landing on the ground and they would laugh hysterically!  Of course, this caught the attention of the homeroom teacher, and I know that she knew I was high, but she never bothered with me.

At Jefferson Davis, I also met a girl named Betsy, who would become my very best friend for many years.  Betsy was not in my homeroom class but she was in my social studies class; remember my homeroom teacher and social studies teacher were one and the same.  Betsy and I managed to get into our share of trouble, being sent to the office and getting paddled;  back in those days they still meted out physical punishment, a treat I truly think should be brought back to schools now-I think it would solve a lot of problems and save much heartache for parents who do not punish their own children when they should, the Bible says, “spare the rod and spoil the child”, but of course, this is for another Dr. Phil episode as I like to say!

As we were walking to lunch, Betsy and I would love to pound on the windows of classrooms we were passing by and then duck.  On more than one occasion this got us sent to the principle’s office.  I also remember one time our teacher had invited in a special guest speaker.  Please don’t ask who it was or what the topic was about-I didn’t care then and I certainly don’t now.  At this time I was starting to develop quite the sense of humor, as many hurting people do, I guess to hide the pain.  While this man was trying to speak Betsy and I were talking and laughing, disturbing the class and this man’s discussion.  Our teacher came up behind us, teeth clenched and said something to the effect that if she could grab us up by our shirt collars without causing a disturbance she would do so and told us to shut up. Now, when we were sent to the office for the window knocking, we were always sent by the teacher of that classroom, not our teacher, but for all the aggravation I would cause in her homeroom and social studies class, she never sent me to the office or really did  much of anything, it truly was a mystery to me.

It stayed a mystery for many years when after I had already graduated high school and my dad said to me, “Hey do you remember Miss. So and So from junior high?”  He was talking about THAT PARTICULAR teacher!  He said, “yeah I met her at Reggie’s and dated her for a while; she told me she had you in her class.”!!!  Mystery solved!  No wonder I never got in any trouble-she didn’t want to get her boyfriends daughter in trouble!  Yep, this is a LOL moment people!!  With all due respect she always reminded me of Miss Piggy, literally, she looked like Miss Piggy to me! I don’t think they dated very long, but I found out that my mom knew about her, but in her true denial form she said that my dad just dated the teacher to make her jealous.  It could be true, who knows.

This behavior, The Chase, went on for several years between my parents.  Now there was no physical violence in the home but a new situation emerged-underage children being left alone at home!

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